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Friday, February 22, 2013

Slice of Life: Take 6




 sneaking in stitches / best dad / scattered flurries / a favorite toy shaped as our beautiful state


There are many things on my mind, like that time I found what I thought was a worm in Iz's diaper but it was really just a thread and E had the pleasure of confirming this for me when he came home, but also more serious things as well. Sometimes I wish I could stop all the thinking I have always done and just not care so much, but I just can't because I am a thinker by nature and although it can sometimes complicate things by having to once again go against the grain, it at least makes me feel like I am being true to myself and doing what I believe is best for my family. But, sometimes I do still wish!

Things are going okay, but pretty silly around here. I am not so obsessed with sleep and fully anticipated just letting our baby sleep on the go, in the wrap, in our arms and so on, but this little lady has such different ideas - seems she is quite the thinker too - and though she gives very obvious signs of being tired, she is the trickiest puzzle to figure out when it comes to getting her the sleep she so desperately needs. Add in a dog that always seems to begin her bark fits once I finally help ease those sweet little eyes shut and it keeps things especially wild. She is still napping on me while nursing as it is the only thing that will keep her asleep for more than five minutes at a time. This can be rough physically as she also has changed up her night time routine and made things a bit more interesting, but I think it is the psychological part that is harder. What I mean is the trying to make time to see people and not being able to really explain in a way they understand that I am unable to have the spontaneity I once had when it comes to getting together. The explaining that no, once she is asleep we can not lay her in her bed or on the couch or in the swing and carry on, not if we actually want her to stay asleep. The feeling judged like people think it's your parenting rather than her personality which is laughable to anyone else who has had a more particular and spirited sort of baby. I really do get it though, for if I had an "easy" baby or was not yet a parent I might think the same thing. I don't mean any of this to complain though, just to get it out. If I knew that she was going to be this strong-minded I wouldn't have changed a thing. If I knew she was going to be twice this strong-minded I still wouldn't. As I sing to her daily, "You are my sunshine, you are my rainbow, you are my lollipop!" and it's so very true, she is all things wonderful and I love every silly, strong, sweet, and adorable little ounce of her. I love how she looks to me with her sweet little smile so many times a day. I love how she reaches out for her favorite dog Jasper with the biggest grin on her face. I love the way she strokes my face while she nurses in my lap and gazes into my eyes. I love seeing the delight on her face when her Dad flies her around above his head. She is incredible, in each and every way.

If it helps to show my love for her any more, we are already thinking ahead to when we will try for another and while we do hope our next will roll with the flow a bit more easily, if they are just as spirited as Iz Bug we will have our hands full, but our hearts will be very full as well and that's a wonderful thing. Don't get any crazy ideas though, this next one won't be coming for a good long while as it is my requirement that my sister is settled into town before the next time. I am desperate for her support and companionship as I travel this curvy path of motherhood and while I could really use it this time I will relish in it the next time around, and that is a large reason why we stay. Despite the temperatures that are colder than I prefer, the lack of oceans, enormous lakes or mountains, we stay for the hope and the love, which isn't to say we would never leave, but most likely not and certainly not any time soon. 

Sara

8 comments:

  1. Know that I understand exactly what you are going through. Our little man was the same with one exception I was the only one who he wanted...he cried up a storm even when my hubby held him. It was tough. Many will not understand and it is not easy to explain it, they just don't understand where you are right now. I can tell you this, it does get easier, it does get better...in time and these days will become a distant memory. I promise. Hugs to you, hang in there.

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  2. I love these pictures - especially sneaking in stitches! :) You are doing such a great job as a mom - I think that with every post of yours that I read. xo

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  3. Thank you so much. It really means a lot to "hear" someone say that. :)

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  4. Thank you friend. It is funny because I really don't think you can understand unless you have been there, which you have, and it's so nice to have that understanding. Most of the time she is having such fun, but if she is tired or hungry there is no satisfying her without the nurse/nap combo. I have heard others say their baby wouldn't even let dad hold them, like with you and Reece, and that must be so hard. I don't get much help with the baby care from E as Izzy is usually pretty sleepy by the time he gets home so there is often a half hour or so tops before I have to take her back and nurse her to sleep and some mornings he takes her out to swing or play while I try to sleep a bit, so that does help. It's funny though, while I look forward to the adventures to come I also know how much I'll miss certain parts of how things are now so I try so hard not to wish any moment of it away.

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  5. Great pics! My first was a handful too, and my second, although still a handful, was much more manageable, so there's hope for Iz's little sibling! :)

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  6. I love all of these photos - especially the knitting one with those cute baby legs! I wish we lived closer so we could hang out! I found that with Sky, the winter months were always so much harder but once summer rolls around, this lighten. Sky has also never been a good sleeper so i'm hoping baby #2 will make up for it. A lot of people I know said their second was easier (haha) so I hope there is some truth to that!!!

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  7. Yes! My sister had the same situation. Little Eloise is a spitfire, but Moira seems to be much more mellow. :)

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  8. Thank you! Oh how I wish we could hang out, that would be amazing. I hope there is truth to the second baby being easier as well. I'll be happy to have another one when the time comes, but it will be a much more challenging time if they are as spirited as our little gal.


    And I agree that the winter months are much harder. I am holding out hope for spring and long walks each day, I think that will make a world of a difference.

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