Today the temperature is supposed to reach nearly one hundred degrees, it'll be a hot one, but you wouldn't know it from in here, for in here it is always raining. The sound machine chugs along, throwing out a constant stream of a strong Spring rain showers, blocking out noises of cars charging past our corner lot, neighborhood dogs barking through the night, and our own clanks and clatters in the evening hours when baby girl is already fast asleep in our room.
I rub the sleepies from my eyes, roll out of bed and visit the bathroom before retreating back to this rain-filled room before the sun comes to find me and call me out to tend to my responsibilities. If only I could smell the rain as well, rather than a bit of sweat and morning breathe of garlic from the concoction I have been having us swallow to help ward off illness.
But anyway, it has been sunny and hot for days now. Our garden enjoys the sunshine, as do we. Saturday after the lawn being mowed and the baby being nursed and snuggled through a nap, the three of us met back up on the front porch and were enjoying a few rare moments to ourselves when I spotted them from across the corner. I saw them zone in on us and almost perk up as we came into sight. These people are always coming door to door around here, the same ones have been to our door more than a handful of times, but we were in their sight now, fleeing would be pointless.
So, we stayed put and as they approached us I let my husband take the lead. When they started talking religion he said he would rather not, yet they pushed forward. We listened kindly and let them have a moment of our time while I continued playing with my daughter and the outdoor gear catalogue we had just fetched from the mailbox. His talk began with mentioning marriage and divorce and how there is so much of it in our society...okay, yes, there is quite a bit...and how strong families are important...yes, agreed...but then it turned sour. With his foot resting on the stoop near my own and knee bent in my direction he quickly turned the discussion toward homosexuality and mentioned how if someone is homosexual it's okay...hmm..are we going to agree on something?...but then quickly said that it was a sin though and no different from adultery.
My mental brakes slammed down hard and I felt myself jolt in the chair beneath me. While I had been mostly quiet during this visit I promptly spoke up, telling him I need to ask him to leave, that he has his beliefs and I have my own and they are very different and that is fine but we just aren't going to be talking anymore. I was reeling myself in and keeping my composure and trying to stay calm and peaceful with my sweet baby girl watching all the while. As they walked away I felt so enraged, so intruded upon in my own home and was unable to shake this feeling for days, but, holding my daughter up in the air for a kiss and a snuggle I loudly proclaimed to her that our beliefs include loving everybody. Because, to me, two people loving each other regardless of their sex is in no way comparable to an individual cheating on the one they proclaimed to love and nobody is welcome to say such things in my home, in front of my daughter.
Then, on Sunday, we ran into an old colleague of my husbands and he spoke of his current job and where he was living, mentioning that him and his partner of 28 years had recently split, selling their old house and buying two smaller ones on the same block because they felt they had a good run and while they weren't in a romantic relationship anymore they were still best friends so they couldn't see living so far apart. That sounds more amicable than most divorces I have seen, that's for sure. And while this doesn't prove anything, it made me feel better and caused me to smile in a very real way because I believe love is love is love and whoever it is that I pray to believes the same.
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