|My favorite way to spend time as a family.|
|Pretty view at my craniosacral therapist's office.|
Self care. Not such an easy thing to come by as a mom of small kids, but something I need to prioritize more than ever. A few months ago I discovered my health scares and concerns all tied into having a condition called Silent Reflux. It sounds fairly innocent but can be pretty dangerous if left to wreak havoc on your esophagus and that scares me, especially after some of the problems I've had with it. When you've struggled with something that you discover can turn into a very severe condition it shakes you up a bit. Things started to improve when I made changes, they got so much better, but then I slipped and slid and didn't keep it as a priority and it's at a really bad place again.
Priority is the important word here. Being a stay at home mom and homeschooling family means that there aren't any daytime hours for me to hustle and plan and squeeze in some fitness by myself. It means a lot of juggling and just making it work, at least right now, at these young ages. That leaves me with those couple of hours at night to squeeze in whatever needs my attention after the girls are in bed and that often means picking and choosing between self care, projects, simplifying, settling into our new home, socializing, writing, budgeting, food prep, and you get it. There are a lot of things calling for my attention but none of those things will be getting my attention if there is no me, so for now, me.
That's how it needs to be at least. Structure and schedules don't come naturally to me, but I do thrive on them, so that might have to mean planning my days and nights out a little more for now and just making it all happen so that I can be the best version of myself and live a long full life in my best health. When I feel like this I feel exhausted, my stomach is messy, I stumble over words reading to my girls due to my hoarse and cloggy throat, my energy is low, anxiety is high, I feel bloated and gunky all around and I'm definitely not getting enough sleep. I noticed these things changed drastically when I made changes before and I need to remember to honor myself enough to keep those changes in place once they start helping again so I don't end up back here. I deserve that and my family deserves that.
So, now to plan out meals, find a new planner for 2017 as my big scratched up 2016 one is almost through, follow the silent reflux food rules and keep a food diary for awhile to figure out my worst triggers - I already know spicy, chocolate and tomato based products do me in and bring the congestion back, find a way to get more exercise in and just do all that needs doing while knowing it will all be worth it. This is going to be another big year of growth and change as we recalibrate in a new place and keep steering our family life in our preferred direction and that means me being my best self in order to make that happen.
There are new gardens to build, settling in to be done, art to make and tiny little hands to hold in my own while we explore the world together. Let that last one be my biggest motivation.